{"id":14585,"date":"2023-05-12T09:18:21","date_gmt":"2023-05-12T09:18:21","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.dumitra.net\/blog\/?p=14585"},"modified":"2023-06-01T05:14:15","modified_gmt":"2023-06-01T05:14:15","slug":"viata-bate-bancul-ba-chiar-si-curul","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.dumitra.net\/blog\/?p=14585","title":{"rendered":"Via\u021ba amoroas\u0103 bate bancul"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Citesc ieri \u00eentr-un editorial de pe gsp urm\u0103torul banc misogin, de inspira\u021bie cretacic\u0103 – nici nu b\u0103nuiam c\u0103, \u00een epoca asta \u00een care rela\u021biile se consum\u0103 ca punga de popcorn pe bancheta din spate a filmului de scurt metraj, mai exist\u0103 astfel de pomeniri din fundul pe\u0219terii -, slobozit parc\u0103 din gura edentat\u0103 de b\u00e2rfitoarea satului cu curajul ascuns dup\u0103 perdelele flasce:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201d\u00cen arbitraj de la o vreme e ca \u00een caricatura aceea \u00een care una prins\u0103 \u00een pat cu amantul \u00eei arunc\u0103 \u00een\u0163epat\u0103 <\/a>so\u0163ului: Drag\u0103, tu crezi ce vezi sau ce \u00ee\u0163i spun eu? Ni se spune (…) c\u0103 ceea ce vedem noi nu e adev\u0103rat. Adev\u0103rat e ce ne spun ei, \u00eenal\u0163ii preo\u0163i ai fluierului. VAR e doar a\u015fa, un amic care \u00ee\u0163i d\u0103 un sfat c\u00e2nd \u0163i se destram\u0103 c\u0103snicia, \u00een niciun caz un judec\u0103tor de divor\u0163.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u00cen povestea \u201dclasic\u0103\u201d, la \u00eendem\u00e2na \u00een\u021belegerii comune a m\u00e2nc\u0103torului de semin\u021be (cojile scuipate \u00een capul celui din fa\u021b\u0103), amantul – c\u00e2t e el de n\u0103r\u0103vit – e absolvit aprioric de vin\u0103, so\u021bul e p\u0103gubitul.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Doar ea, \u201duna\u201d, e plin\u0103 ochi de p\u0103catul adulterului pentru c\u0103 a ridicat coada \u0219i a \u00eendr\u0103znit \u201ds\u0103 iubeasc\u0103 doi oameni, pentru c\u0103 a\u0219a se echilibreaz\u0103 balan\u021ba sufletului, doi iubi\u021bi care se completeaz\u0103 unul pe cel\u0103lalt, iar lucrurile devin mai pu\u021bin \u00eensp\u0103im\u00e2nt\u0103toare, \u0219i cu c\u00e2t m\u0103 excita mai tare g\u00e2ndul la ceea ce m\u0103 a\u0219tepta a doua zi diminea\u021b\u0103, aveam impresia c\u0103 \u0219i Yoni m\u0103 excit\u0103\u201d.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Despre \u201duna\u201d e vorba \u0219i \u00een cartea asta devastatoate, terminat\u0103 azi. Iar judec\u0103torul de divor\u021b din pasajul citat mai sus e chiar amicul cu care amantul o \u00eemparte pe \u201duna\u201d. Ve\u021bi vedea \u0219i de ce…<\/p>\n\n\n\n

E \u00eens\u0103 \u201duna\u201d v\u0103zut\u0103 dintr-o alt\u0103 lumin\u0103, contorsionat\u0103, gol-golu\u021b\u0103, de\u0219irat\u0103, admirabil de curajoas\u0103 \u0219i bolnav\u0103 deopotriv\u0103, deraiat\u0103 de pe \u0219inele \u201dbunului sim\u021b\u201d erotic \u0219i conjugal, \u0219i marital.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201dUna\u201d care, prins\u0103 \u00eentre doi b\u0103rba\u021bi – unul (t\u00e2n\u0103rul so\u021b) excesiv de prevenitor; cel\u0103lat, amantul (mai b\u0103tr\u00e2n, prieten al tat\u0103lui \u0219i fost iubit al mamei), rece, distant, greu excitabil, nu cu iubire fa\u021b\u0103 de ea, ci dependent de dependen\u021ba ei de el, plictisit de tot \u0219i toate, cu nevoie din ce \u00een ce mai mare de stimulente sexuale, \u00eemp\u0103r\u021bind-o (\u00een acela\u0219i acuplaj) pe \u201duna\u201d cu prietenul lui, judec\u0103torul, cel lipsit de erec\u021bie, dar drept-erect \u00een dreptatea \u00eemp\u0103r\u021bit\u0103 \u00een sala de judecat\u0103 din v\u00e2rful cioc\u0103nelului.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201dVezi tu, o simpl\u0103 partid\u0103 de sex, un b\u0103rbat peste o femeie, m\u0103 excit\u0103 chiar mai pu\u021bin dec\u00e2t s\u0103 fac exerci\u021bii fizice \u00een fa\u021ba televizorului. Poate c\u0103 lucrurile stau a\u0219a privite dintr-un punct de vedere tehnic, am \u00eencercat eu s\u0103-l provoc, dar cum r\u0103m\u00e2ne cu partea sentimental\u0103? Se spune c\u0103 asta face diferen\u021ba, dac\u0103 e\u0219ti \u00eendr\u0103gostit de o femeie, sexul cu ea te excit\u0103, nu? E ca \u00eentr-o conversa\u021bie, nu?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

De ce crezi c-a\u0219 fi interesat de discu\u021bii? De unde \u0219i p\u00e2n\u0103 unde ceea ce \u021bi-am spus despre sex se aplic\u0103 \u0219i \u00eentr-o discu\u021bie? Stimulentele trebuie s\u0103 fie din ce \u00een ce mai puternice. Sentimente? Nici nu mai \u0219tiu ce sunt acelea. Odat\u0103 cu trecerea anilor, omul devine din ce \u00een ce mai animalic sau mai copil\u0103ros, iar \u00een func\u021bie de asta are propriile necesit\u0103\u021bi.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ea – cu via\u021ba distrus\u0103 (\u00ee\u0219i p\u0103r\u0103se\u0219te, poate temporar?, so\u021bul chiar \u00eenaintea plec\u0103rii \u00eentr-o lun\u0103 de miere \u00eent\u00e2rziat\u0103 cu cinci ani), \u00eendr\u0103gostit\u0103 \u0219i iubind f\u0103r\u0103 puterea de a se desprinde de amant, de\u0219i \u0219tie c\u0103 face o gre\u0219eal\u0103; el, amantul, distrus de plictiseal\u0103.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

De plictiseala sexual\u0103.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

O recomand (dac\u0103-mi e permis cuv\u00e2ntul), \u00een special b\u0103rba\u021bilor, pentru infinita frumu\u0219ete (de fapt, toat\u0103 cartea e o frumuse\u021be trist\u0103, dar frumuse\u021be \u00eentru totul) a pove\u0219tii-parabol\u0103 descifrate \u00eentr-o alt\u0103 cheie dec\u00e2t bancul prost\u0103nac de mai sus: Un t\u00e2mplar c\u0103ruia i-a fost furat\u0103 so\u021bia, iar \u00een cele din urm\u0103 a ajuns s\u0103-i serveasc\u0103 at\u00e2t pe ea, c\u00e2t \u0219i pe so\u021bul ei cel nou, iar lacrimile lui de durere curgeau \u00een c\u0103nile lor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u0218i de ce pl\u00e2nge t\u00e2mplarul? Pentru soarta lui, a so\u021biei, care acum e a altuia, \u0219i ce nedreptate i s-a f\u0103cut – am fi tenta\u021bi s\u0103 spunem. \u0218i dac\u0103 pl\u00e2nge pentru nedreptatea pe care i-a f\u0103cut-o so\u021biei? \u0218i cine e omul r\u0103u \u00een poveste? So\u021bul, so\u021bia sau amantul?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201dSo\u021bul s-a \u00eenvoit s\u0103 o trimit\u0103 la ucenic pentru a-\u0219i ob\u021bine \u00eemprumutul. Doar a pus-o \u00een pericol \u00een mod explicit, numai pentru a-\u0219i ob\u021bine banii, \u0219i cum se face c\u0103 vreme de trei zile nu s-a obosit s-o caute, trei nop\u021bi a mers la culcare f\u0103r\u0103 ea, s-a trezit f\u0103r\u0103 ea, \u0219i abia \u00een ziua a treia a venit la ucenic s\u0103-l \u00eentrebe ce s-a \u00eent\u00e2mplat cu ea, \u0219i atunci, auzind c\u0103 tinerii o p\u00e2ng\u0103riser\u0103 pe drum, \u00een loc s-o ia acas\u0103, s-o \u00eengrijeasc\u0103 \u0219i s-o consoleze, s-a \u00eenvoit cu u\u0219urin\u021b\u0103 s\u0103 divor\u021beze, imediat ce ucenicul i-a oferit pre\u021bul prev\u0103zut \u00een contractul prenup\u021bial.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

De ce nu verific\u0103, de ce n-o \u00eentreab\u0103, doar el \u00eensu\u0219i o trimisese \u00een aventura asta. Nu vede\u021bi un lan\u021b \u00eentreg de p\u0103cate \u00een numele c\u0103rora a fost dat\u0103 sentin\u021ba!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Da, cam a\u0219a e \u0219i cu via\u021ba: un lan\u021b \u00eentreg de p\u0103cate \u00een numele c\u0103rora punem etichete, d\u0103m sentin\u021be, scriem bancuri… scriem c\u0103r\u021bi.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Am \u00eenceput cu \u201dDestin\u201d <\/a>\u0219i-am ajuns inevitabil la \u201dVia\u021ba amoroas\u0103\u201d. Nu \u0219tiu care mi-a pl\u0103cut mai mult \u0219i mai mult. \u0218tiu doar c\u0103 ambele sunt sclipitoare.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ce urmeaz\u0103 acum?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Deocamdat\u0103, un gol. \u0218i nu de poart\u0103… dar acu\u0219i-acu\u0219i vine \u201dSimon\u201d \u0219i-l umple.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Citesc ieri \u00eentr-un editorial de pe gsp urm\u0103torul banc misogin, de inspira\u021bie cretacic\u0103 – nici nu b\u0103nuiam c\u0103, \u00een epoca asta \u00een care rela\u021biile se consum\u0103 ca punga de popcorn pe bancheta din spate...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"ngg_post_thumbnail":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1413],"tags":[2304,2303,2302,2301],"class_list":["post-14585","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-raftul-lui-radu","tag-cum-e-viata-amoroasa","tag-pareri-viata-amoroasa","tag-recenzie-viata-amoroasa","tag-zeruya-shalev-viata-amoroasa"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.dumitra.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/14585","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.dumitra.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.dumitra.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.dumitra.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.dumitra.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=14585"}],"version-history":[{"count":13,"href":"https:\/\/www.dumitra.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/14585\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":14734,"href":"https:\/\/www.dumitra.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/14585\/revisions\/14734"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.dumitra.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=14585"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.dumitra.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=14585"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.dumitra.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=14585"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}