{"id":10918,"date":"2018-10-04T14:52:38","date_gmt":"2018-10-04T14:52:38","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.dumitra.net\/blog\/?p=10918"},"modified":"2021-11-27T09:42:19","modified_gmt":"2021-11-27T09:42:19","slug":"geanta-geanta-geanta-i-cu-belea","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.dumitra.net\/blog\/?p=10918","title":{"rendered":"Geanta, geanta! Geanta-i cu belea….."},"content":{"rendered":"

Printre sufletele dobrogene de t\u0103tari, turci, rom\u00e2ni sau bulgari \u021b\u00e2\u0219ni, ca o furtun\u0103 de confetti, vestea c\u0103, \u00eentr-un sat cu nume rezonant, un preot harist<\/em>  face minuni…. \u0218i, dac\u0103 e cu minuni, norodul – intelectual, muncitor sau \u021b\u0103ran – merge musai puhoi (c\u0103 e\u0219ti ca \u0219i sfin\u021bit, nu-i a\u0219a?), cu ma\u0219ina, cu sacul sau, dac\u0103 nu, m\u0103car cu …..<\/p>\n

-Ai auzit, drag\u0103, de preotul X, din satul cutare?<\/em> <\/strong> Rodica nici n-a  mai a\u0219teptat r\u0103spunsul meu, c\u0103 a \u0219i continuat afectat:<\/p>\n

-Face minuni! Eu zic s\u0103 mergem \u0219i noi.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

-Mda<\/strong><\/em>, zic eu u\u0219or nedumerit\u0103, hai s\u0103 mergem!<\/strong><\/em> I-am zis a\u0219a, \u00eentr-o doar\u0103, f\u0103r\u0103 s\u0103 m\u0103 g\u00e2ndesc prea mult.<\/p>\n

Rodica e o doamn\u0103 pe care o cunoscusem cu mul\u021bi ani \u00een urm\u0103, iar acum o luase pe calea bisericii.<\/p>\n

Fii atent\u0103!<\/strong><\/em>, zice ea. Aranjez eu, tu doar s\u0103 mergi cu ma\u0219inu\u021ba…. S\u0103-\u021bi iei \u0219i ceva pe cap, c\u0103 nu po\u021bi s\u0103 stai  oricum<\/strong><\/em> acolo….S\u0103 \u0219tii a\u0219a…. e lume mult\u0103\u0103\u0103\u0103-mult\u0103\u0103\u0103\u0103\u0103…; e lume mult\u0103, da’ trebuie s\u0103 \u00een\u021belegi \u0219i tu c\u0103 dac\u0103 vrei s\u0103….., trebuie s\u0103…..<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

\u00cei zic: bine, mergem. Acuma, dac\u0103 am f\u0103cut promisiunea, trebuia s\u0103 m\u0103 \u021bin de cuv\u00e2nt. Plec\u0103m \u00eenspre locul cu minuni. Rodica m\u0103 preg\u0103te\u0219te din masin\u0103:<\/p>\n

-\u00ce\u021bi mai zic \u00eenc\u0103 o dat\u0103<\/strong><\/em> (acuma, am pornit-am pornit): o s\u0103 fie lume mult\u0103. Da ‘tu, tu nu trebuie s\u0103 faci nimic, tu doar te \u021bii dup\u0103 mine. Da’ te \u021bii dup\u0103 mine, c\u0103  – o s\u0103 vezi, – ajungem \u00een fa\u021b\u0103, la altar.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

Ajugem acolo, \u00een curtea biseicii, dup\u0103 ce abia g\u0103sii un loc de parcare. Privesc consternat\u0103 \u00eemprejur. Potop de lume ori\u00eencotro vedeai cu ochii; lumea dup\u0103 lume, aglomera\u021bie, nebunie, v\u00e2nzoleal\u0103, \u00eenghesuial\u0103…. V\u0103z\u00e2nd asta, \u00eei zic:<\/p>\n

-B\u0103i, Rodico, ce facem noi aici, m\u0103 fat\u0103…? \u0218i ca s\u0103 st\u0103m \u00een curte…?<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

-Ai t\u0103cut?<\/strong><\/em> \u00eemi r\u0103spunse scurt \u0219i \u00een\u021bepat, ca \u0219i cum s-ar fi adresat unui t\u00e2nc. \u021ai-am zis s\u0103 te \u021bii dup\u0103 mine!<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

Ei bine, nu \u0219tiu ce a f\u0103cut, nu \u0219tiu cum a f\u0103cut (c\u0103 eu nu mai vedeam nimic; m\u0103 luar\u0103 ni\u0219te c\u0103lduri…\u0219i ni\u0219te nebuneli…) c\u0103 am ajuns \u00een fat\u0103, l\u00e2ng\u0103 altar. Eram \u00een interiorul bisericii ca sardelele. V\u0103 imagina\u021bi cum ne-am putut strecura…. Nu mai puteai respira, dar\u0103mite s\u0103 te mi\u0219ti; dac\u0103 ai fi aruncat un ac, nu ajungea la podea… \u0218i-mi face din nou instructajul, \u00een \u0219oapt\u0103 \u0219i afectat, p\u0103truns\u0103 de moment:<\/p>\n

-Fii atent\u0103! <\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

-Da<\/strong><\/em>, zic eu sugrumat\u0103 de c\u0103ldur\u0103 \u0219i de nervi.<\/p>\n

-O s\u0103 ias\u0103 cu Sfintele Daruri….<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

-P\u0103i, ce ne d\u0103…?<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

-……..Sfintele Daruri, drag\u0103!<\/strong><\/em> \u00eemi r\u0103spunde ap\u0103sat \u0219i r\u0103stit.<\/p>\n

-P\u0103i \u0219i eu te \u00eentreb: CE NE D\u0102?<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

Totu\u0219i….<\/em><\/p>\n

Ea, uit\u00e2ndu-se disperat\u0103 la mine, \u00eemi r\u0103spunse:<\/p>\n

-Smirn\u0103 \u0219i t\u0103m\u00e2ie!<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

-Aaaaaa, da, da,<\/strong><\/em> zic eu abia respir\u00e2nd din cauza valurilor de c\u0103ldur\u0103 \u0219i transpira\u021bie care curgeau de prin toate p\u0103r\u021bile. Sper c\u0103 n-a\u021bi uitat c\u0103 eram chiar \u00een buza altarului, eram fruntea.<\/p>\n

-Fii atent\u0103!<\/strong><\/em>, \u00eemi zice \u00eentorc\u00e2ndu-se c\u00e2t mai aproape de urechea mea, c\u00e2nd iese preotul, noi trebuie s\u0103 ne culc\u0103m pe jos.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

-P\u0103i,<\/strong><\/em> zic eu, de ce?<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

-P\u0103i, trebuie s\u0103 treac\u0103 peste noi. S\u0103 ne p\u0103\u0219easc\u0103….<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

-Aaaa<\/strong><\/em>, zic din ce \u00een ce mai nedumerit\u0103, de ce s\u0103 ne p\u0103\u0219easc\u0103….???<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

–<\/strong>Ca s\u0103 ne…. fac\u0103 de… s\u0103n\u0103tate, de cas\u0103….\u0219i fii atent\u0103! Pui t\u0103m\u00e2ia asta pe care \u021bi-o dau eu acuma, i-o pui \u00een c\u0103delni\u021b\u0103, iei poala popii \u0219i o pupi ; \u0219i geanta…..<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

-Ce-i cu geanta?<\/strong><\/em> m\u0103 ar\u0103tai eu complet ame\u021bit\u0103. Ce-i cu geanta?<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

-S\u0103 nu ui\u021bi geanta! <\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

-Ce-i cu ea?????<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

-S-o p\u0103\u0219easc\u0103, drag\u0103! S\u0103 p\u0103\u0219easc\u0103 \u0219i peste geant\u0103….<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

–<\/strong>Aha<\/em>, p\u0103i nu \u0219tiu, de unde s\u0103 \u0219tiu….<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

De acas\u0103, c\u00e2nd am plecat, \u00eemi luai la repezeal\u0103, c\u0103 uitasem, o e\u0219arf\u0103. Am tras \u0219i eu ce mi-a venit la m\u00e2n\u0103…Am apucat o e\u0219arf\u0103 de nylon, d’aia cu animal print…. \u0218i ea zice dintr-o dat\u0103:<\/p>\n

-Baticul, drag\u0103!<\/strong><\/em> \u0218i mi-l pun….<\/p>\n

Dac\u0103 mi-o legam sub b\u0103rbie, nu puteam s\u0103 respir, dac\u0103 o legam la spate, c\u0103dea. C\u00e2nd a\u0219a, de nu mai vedeam nimic, c\u00e2nd se ducea pe spate…\u00cen fine, o leg din nou sub b\u0103rbie. \u0218i, la un moment dat, asta zice:<\/p>\n

-Hai s\u0103 ne culc\u0103m!<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

M\u0103 uitai \u00een st\u00e2nga-n dreapta…,da’ nu prea era loc.  Bra\u021bele le aveam st\u00e2ns lipite de corp, c\u0103 nu aveai loc nici s\u0103 te scarpini \u00een nas… \u0218i asta zice \u0219uierat:<\/p>\n

-Vezi c\u0103 iese.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

Baticul, \u00eentre timp, \u00eemi c\u0103zuse \u00eentr-o parte, geanta nu mai \u0219tiu pe unde o aveam…<\/p>\n

-Culc\u0103-te!<\/strong><\/em> \u00eemi \u0219uier\u0103 din nou disperat. M\u0103 culcai pe o parte, cu bra\u021bele un singur bloc cu trupul, nu mai aveai cum s\u0103 mi\u0219ti. St\u0103team to\u021bi pe o parte, ca boabele pe ciorchine. Capul, dac\u0103-l \u021bineam la p\u0103m\u00e2nt, nu vedeam nimic, m\u00e2na dreapt\u0103 era \u00een\u021bepenit\u0103 cu po\u0219eta \u0219i ea striga:<\/p>\n

-Geanta, geanta!<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

Eu m\u0103 chinuiam cu baticul, cum \u00eel d\u0103deam, nu st\u0103tea deloc. Acu\u0219 \u00eel tr\u0103geam, acu\u0219 se ducea din nou pe spate…. Asta, din spatele meu, tot striga: geanta, geanta! Mi se blocase cumva spre spate, nu mai puteam s\u0103 o trag. \u00centr-o m\u00e2n\u0103 aveam t\u0103m\u00e2ia, iar ea striga disperat\u0103:<\/p>\n

-Pup\u0103-i poala, pup\u0103 poala popii!<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

S\u0103-i pun t\u0103m\u00e2ia, s\u0103-mi trag baticul, care iar \u00eemi c\u0103zuse, s\u0103 trag geanta. Nu mai vedeam nimic. Zic, \u00een g\u00e2ndul meu, acuma ce s\u0103 fac: s\u0103-l \u00eempiedic pe pop\u0103? c\u0103 nu mai \u0219tiam cum s\u0103 trag geanta….Cum s\u0103 mai pup \u0219i poala popii… \u0218i asta tot stiga disperat\u0103 \u00een spatele meu:<\/p>\n

-Geanta, geanta!<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

S\u0103 trag dintr-o smucitur\u0103 geanta \u0219i s\u0103-l \u00eempiedic pe pop\u0103???? Erau l\u00e2ng\u0103 mine un nene…. cam a\u0219a, doi pe doi, doamne directoare…., mironosi\u021be….<\/p>\n

N-am zis nimic pe moment, eram cheaun\u0103…\u00cens\u0103, c\u00e2nd am ie\u0219it, i-am zis clar \u0219i r\u0103spicat:<\/p>\n

-E prima \u0219i ultima oar\u0103…. S\u0103 nu m\u0103 mai chemi niciodat\u0103 la a\u0219a ceva. C\u0103 nu mai vin. I-am zis: dac\u0103 asta e credin\u021b\u0103…, \u00eenseamn\u0103 c\u0103 suntem r\u0103u de tot.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

-P\u0103i, de ce, m\u0103i Zina?<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

-F\u0103, auzi, m\u0103 la\u0219i? Ce-i asta, drag\u0103? T\u0103v\u0103leala asta pe jos<\/strong><\/em>. Lumea ziceai c\u0103 e prostit\u0103. Popa nu avea loc pe unde s\u0103 calce. Toat\u0103 lumea era pe jos…Domnule, n-ai v\u0103zut a\u0219a ceva: SAR-DE-LE! Preotul c\u0103lca \u0219i pe tine, \u0219i pe l\u00e2ng\u0103 tine. Miau<\/em> nu scotea una…I-am zis:<\/p>\n

-S\u0103 m\u0103 ierte bunul Dumnezeu, asta-i credin\u021b\u0103? \u00cen asta const\u0103 credin\u021ba? Las\u0103-m\u0103-n pace….!<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

Am realizat ridicolul situa\u021biei c\u00e2nd m-am v\u0103zut t\u0103v\u0103lit\u0103 p-acolo, d\u0103-i, pune-i \u0103lea, trage poala…Eu chiar am crezut \u00eentr-o chestie frumoas\u0103…. <\/p>\n

P.S. Povestea a fost istorisit\u0103 la ceas de sear\u0103, \u00een r\u00e2setul continuu al celor ce-o ascultam, la masa de su<\/em>b bolta vi\u021bei de vie a doamnei S\u00e2rbu. A fost \u00eensutit mai bun\u0103 dec\u00e2t orice scen\u0103 dintr-un stand-up comedy. Multumesc, doamn\u0103 Zina! Ne-a\u021bi f\u0103cut seara de poveste….  <\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Printre sufletele dobrogene de t\u0103tari, turci, rom\u00e2ni sau bulgari \u021b\u00e2\u0219ni, ca o furtun\u0103 de confetti, vestea c\u0103, \u00eentr-un sat cu nume rezonant, un preot harist  face minuni…. \u0218i, dac\u0103 e cu minuni, norodul –...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"ngg_post_thumbnail":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-10918","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-personal"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.dumitra.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10918","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.dumitra.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.dumitra.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.dumitra.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.dumitra.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=10918"}],"version-history":[{"count":12,"href":"https:\/\/www.dumitra.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10918\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":12490,"href":"https:\/\/www.dumitra.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10918\/revisions\/12490"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.dumitra.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=10918"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.dumitra.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=10918"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.dumitra.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=10918"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}